All is fair in business...

Today is the last day of the month. A day I wait for every month. Today is the day I would be clearing all my debts. With God. People use cheat, cunning, shrewd, heartless, foxy and similar adjectives to address me. I call myself a businessman. That's what I do. Business. I accept my business isn't confined to legal boundaries only. But I also bribe many officials to keep running in this rat race. 'All is fair in business' is the mantra I use. So far I have been successful. For the past 20 years that is...

For the past 20 years it has been a practice of mine to total up all my profits in a month and 'gift' 5℅ of it to God. People call it donation. I call it bribe. Yes. Even the Almighty needs to be bribed. So that the next month is more profitable and the risks would be taken care off. Today is the day I would visit the temple again. I hate debts. That's why I look forward to this day. My profits this year have been showing a negative trend. Last month it was 2.6 crores but this month they add up to 2 crores only. Damn this global recession. 2009 should be a better year. Hopefully. So here I head to the temple...

My bribes are always in ten rupee notes. That's my identity. People get astonished whenever I bring bags and bags of notes to donate. Today, if my calculations are correct, I should be giving God some 1000 ten rupee bundles, 300 less than last time. And I hate beggars. Why should they come in between two dealers, God and I? Usually I walk past totally oblivious to their existence. But this guy stuck me today. When I was walking past, he sang my favorite song with consummate ease and asked for alms as he proclaimed to be blind and handicapped in legs. It is generally tough to move my heart. But today it was moved. I took out a ten rupee note from one bundle and gave it to him. And I went straight to the place where God has stoned himself...

I admire him. God. Totally. All he does is keep sitting in one place and he gets all the money he wants. That takes some business sense. But today I was going to castigate him.
'Hey God!! You promised me more this month! You took 1300 bundles last month for what? Be truthful to the partnership! Adhere to the business ethics! I am disappointed with you. Atleast make sure that in 2009 you remain loyal to your partner. Anyways. You got 1000 this month. That's all. And ya I took off a ten rupee note to give that beggar. Your fine for disappointing me! Chalo. See you next month then. Happy new year to you! Bye'

God and I are more like friends. We have always been. I need him and he needs me. So everything was done. I have cleared all my debts successfully. I was walking with my head held high when I saw the beggar walking past me. Walking!!
The thing with beggars is that you can't really differentiate one from another. But this time I was sure because he was humming the same tune. The tune I love. And he was walking without any support. Didn't he say he was blind? I followed him wanting to take back the ten rupees and stopped short to listen to his conversation with my friend, God.
'Hey God! You have been generous to me today. Some gentleman donated ten to me just now. I know I cheat. But you have made me this way. Today totally I got 20 rupees. As I have promised, I will give half of it to you. Here is the ten'
I saw him giving God the same ten I had given him. The ten that God should have got in the first place. I turned and walked back to my car. I learnt a lot today. God has many friends, so he can't always satisfy, take care of every customer. I need to be patient with him. God creates cheaters. So that he can make a living. And God is an amazing businessman! Look how he got back the ten which I fined him!!! All is fair in business...